One of the most suffocating and frustrating challenges during our academic and professional lives is managing to stay out of the crosshairs of those who can make our lives hell. It can be teachers, managers, bosses, or even our own peers. Now imagine if you're targeted and made to endure unnecessary challenges when it's no fault of yours. Well, fret not! That's what we're going to discuss today.
I spy and keep an eye on the "tormentor extraordinaire"
The simplest and most basic rule is to understand from your seniors, alumni, or anyone else with experience about whom to stay away from, right? No! That's where most of us go wrong.
We get sucked into an unconscious bias, and in most cases, adhere to it simply to keep the harmony of the group intact. Here's what's worked wonders for me: test the waters, accept what you hear at face value, and do your bit to really understand what's true and what's not. The culprit for a person's reputation usually begins with someone rubbing them the wrong way and somehow managing to prove to the world that it wasn't their fault at all. That snowballs, and not many even try to figure out if it's a myth or not.
I'm also not saying that you should ignore the warnings around you. All I'm saying is, write your own story by observing those whom you feel or have heard create problems and then arrive at a conclusion. You never know, you might be the one to prove everyone else wrong.
Rapport 101: Build strong relationships
Do your best to build a strong rapport with everyone around you, especially your faculty. Your interpersonal skills work wonders, and focus on being genuine. Don't smile or greet people like it's an imposition; be respectful and courteous, which is something that's forgotten by many youngsters today.
But, despite you being a goody-two-shoes and still being harassed, here are some steps that you can take:
1. Be a diligent documentarian
Evidence, proof and documentation are three crucial things! Ensure that you possess a record of every instance, interaction, incident, and conflict. Channel your inner detective and note down dates, times, locations, and any potential witnesses who can corroborate your story if it comes to that. The more documentation you have, the more ammunition you'll possess, which shall make it impossible for your tormentor to slither away from accepting their mistakes and shall help you hold them accountable.
2. Make some noise, just with your voice
Rhyming aside, I'm referring to voicing out your opinion when you face injustice though you're sure about your innocence. Ensure that you address the issue and not be afraid of using clear, concise, confident, and assertive language to communicate your grievances to the appropriate authorities. Remember, documentation and voicing out your opinion go hand in hand. Without one, the other becomes slightly less effective.
3. Social media - yeah!
In the age of stories, tweets, reels and snaps, social media can be the most effective weapon to combat harassment. But you need to understand, ascertain, and figure out your strategy: Whether you're going to wage a full-on war or take the stealthy route left to you. Irrespective of what you decide, ensure that you share your experiences effectively. Post in groups and other public platforms that you feel have the right audience who shall understand your situation and support you, rather than posting in the wrong place and getting trolled, which further adds to a harrowing experience. Remember not to slander; we're aiming to propel our message, not starting an online smear campaign!
4. Seek help - professional, personal, and emotional
It's always better to be equipped on all fronts, and seeking legal advice becomes very important. But apart from that, don't shy away from seeking help from your loved ones or those whom you feel shall aid you in becoming emotionally balanced. You can also seek out those who've had similar experiences and make a group that shall assist you to unite and conquer!
5. Go up the ladder
If you're still not getting the required results, never be afraid to escalate the issue to the concerned higher-ups and even authorities by lodging a formal complaint. It'll be a big plus if you have all the above right, as that's when your case becomes airtight. Before you escalate issues, ensure that your paper trail, documentation, proof, and evidence are all meticulously presented.
As I sign off, my dearest superstar scholars, facing harassment might feel like battling dragons in a labyrinth, but remember that you have the required tools to emerge victorious. So march ahead! Armed with wit and wisdom, conquer the battlefield like the fierce warrior you are. Your voice deserves to be heard, your rights deserve to be protected, and your education deserves to be harassment-free.
Godspeed to you all,
Adarsh Benakappa Basavaraj
Your Coach
