Wassup, my peeps! This week I come with a different style of expression, and this is what my message to y'all is going to be.
The videos of college students dancing their hearts out went viral, and before one could even utter "freedom to express," so-called critics have crawled out of the woodwork with cries of "vulgarity" and "unbecoming behaviour".
Some even commented that it was a "waste of money" to admit them into such reputed institutions, but can we look at it from a different perspective without imposing any judgements?
It is all about having fun, self-expression, and embracing the excitement of a new chapter. But to some, particularly the "boomers," it’s a breach of some unspoken, outdated moral code.
Newsflash: This isn’t the 1970s, grow up people!
Before I too face the flak, I want to make my stand clear and am in no way encouraging anything vulgar, pushing the limits of decency, or saying it's okay to go against the social norms.
The whole intent is to try and bridge a gap between the generations and bring in a better understanding of how things are evolving and how little control we have over this.
My advice: "Join their team, be a facilitator and a guide, rather than a critic"!
Before I move to dismiss these criticisms as harmless banter, I'd like to emphasise the impact.
Imagine starting your college journey, full of hope and energy, only to find your moves dissected and branded "inappropriate" by strangers online. This kind of scrutiny doesn’t just sting; it scars. For many, it breeds self-doubt, anxiety, and an unnecessary burden of proving their worth to a society that refuses to evolve.
Mental health takes the biggest hit and I have seen it up close, yes! Kids aren't what they used to be and are highly sensitive these days, but that's evolution and we need to adapt.
Instead of savouring the joys of college life, students today are forced to tiptoe around a minefield of judgment, moral policing, and whatnot. And let’s not even get started on the internet’s ability to amplify negativity — one viral post can mean endless trolling or a cycle of bullying that's enough to put one into a lifetime of depression.
The pressure isn’t confined to social media alone. It extends into personal interactions, where every act of self-expression is scrutinised through the lens of conservative morality.
This creates a cycle of hesitation and self-censorship, where students second-guess their actions to preemptively shield themselves from criticism.
'Change is culture and culture is change, and change is constant!' Culture is like a living, breathing entity shaped by each generation.
What might have been taboo decades ago could be an accepted, even celebrated, form of expression today. Take homosexuality for that matter.
But, many critics cling to their outdated definitions of propriety, viewing any deviation as a threat rather than an evolution. What has made us accept homosexuality and consider the LGBTQIA+ community "normal"? Becoming aware and educated, and that's the first advice I have...
1. Recognise your biases
Nostalgia for your youth might make the new norms seem unfamiliar or wrong. That’s not a cultural collapse — it’s called change.
2. Understand the context before critiquing
What you see as “vulgar,” they see as a way of bonding and having fun. It's not about you; it’s about them expressing their identity.
Yes, actions and behaviours ought to be balanced, but that doesn't give us the right to police them.
3. Being the champion of evolution
Culture isn’t static, it is fluid. Earlier generations redefined norms in their time too. Rock music, bell bottoms, or whatever else annoyed your elders?
Same story, here too... If the tables were turned... I don't think we'd be able to cope with the criticism from the youth of today. See the pattern?
Instead of condemning these dance performances as "vulgar," what we need to do is ask ourselves: what do they represent? Connection? Freedom? Joy? These performances are less about rebellion and more about students finding their rhythm — literally and metaphorically in a fast-changing world.
Dismissing them outright as improper isn’t just narrow-minded; it’s a missed opportunity to understand and appreciate the cultural shifts happening right in front of us.
One point to rest my case: I see most parents come to me to try and "get through" to their kids and hope that they can to be their "best friend" whilst, subconsciously labelling their actions and expressions as "unbecoming, vulgar, rebellious, and so on."
This not only exposes a deep-seated bias against youth and their modes of engagement with the world but it is like trying to start a fire by using a fire extinguisher as fuel!
So, how do we deal with this wave of criticism? By turning it into a teachable moment. Here are a few tips for educating the naysayers while keeping it classy:
1. Flip the lens: Politely ask the critics to imagine their youth. Wasn’t there a time they danced, laughed, and maybe even broke a few rules? Connecting the dots between their experiences and today’s youth can spark empathy and that's what is crucial here.
2. Highlight the positives: Frame these performances as celebrations of creativity and emphasise how they bring students together and foster a sense of belonging.
3. Don't be combative, discuss and not debate: Avoid turning the conversation into a debate. Instead, allow critics to share their perspectives while gently placing your points as a discussion rather than a confrontation.
As I sign off my darlings...own your dance!
Have fun and remember that you owe no one an explanation for celebrating life. But, remember not to give in to peer pressure or any other kind of pressure to push the boundaries, do something that you don't feel like or want to, and/or engage in any form of risk-taking behaviour. Always remember the keyword is balance and as long as you have got that covered, live life on your terms, shine bright, and don’t let the scrutiny dim your light. Don’t let the so-called critics dim your light!
With regards,
Adarsh Benakappa Basavaraj
Your loving coach and "not a critic"
