Why we must change our attitudes to change the way we diss people about their physical appearance

Dear Readers,
The recent name change of FAIR AND LOVELY to GLOW AND LOVELY got me to develop an irresistible itch to write about how it’s not the CHANGE IN NAME but the CHANGE IN ATTITUDE that’s required. I had LAUDED the actress Sai Pallavi’s decision to NOT ENDORSE FAIRNESS CREAMS in my column last year and I still am of the opinion that all celebrities and influencers should join hands to end all types of discrimination. Especially now! As its the right time with the whole world waking up to the #BlackLivesMatter Movement. 

I’ve been very loud in voicing out my disgust about any kind of discrimination based on skin colours. It all adds to us DEMEANING and BELITTLING a human being for no fault of theirs. We’re all creations of God and nature. Neither do we possess the ability to colour shift like a chameleon nor possess a natural way to mutate into WHAT SOCIETY CONSIDERS BEAUTIFUL. We’re all beautiful inside and that’s the ATTITUDE that we need to develop.

#My OWN Story: Since I’ve written about this a lot, I’ll be very brief. Throughout my life, I’ve been BODYSHAMED because I’ve been fat. Even now! Some might do it to my face while some hurt me very SUBTLY, like asking me not to lean on their cars. But what hurts me the most is when some of them say it’s okay that you’re fat, but you would have been a little BETTER to LOOK AT if you were FAIR! This drives me nuts! WHO DECIDES THESE THINGS? Why is it that we consider something FAIR to be better? In fact, there have been several research articles that have proven that dark-skinned people have better and smoother skin which doesn’t get wrinkled because of the high melanin content, which is responsible for skin tone in the first place. 

The Necessary Step: We’re all creatures of CLASSICAL CONDITIONING. It plays a very important role in how we perceive, understand and respond to our beliefs. I completely agree to one of the posts that I recently read which said that until and unless we STOP associating BLACK to negative aspects, we’ll never be able to stop this discrimination. 

Breaking Beliefs: NECESSITY! That’s the MAGIC WORD in this context. Why is it that we’re OKAY using BLACK PHONES, BLACK CARS, BLACK ROADS and many others things that are BLACK? Why is it that I’ve seen many men FEAR of losing their BLACK HAIR? Why not embrace WHITE there too? Yes! It’s all in our mind!

Empathise! A bonus tip would be to simply put yourself in the shoes of the other person who is DEEMED BLACK, UGLY OR NOT BEAUTIFUL and understand how you would feel. INNER BEAUTY is the BEAUTY OF YOUR MIND and how you treat others is what MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL. Applying a layer of cream, cosmetics or makeup shouldn’t be the criteria for us to BLEND IN! Forget FAIRNESS OR GLOWING from the outside, GLOW FROM WITHIN YOU. I’m fat, slightly dark, and have even been called ugly... But irrespective of whether I’m glowing or not, I do my best to bring a smile to the faces of the people around me and make THEM GLOW! Well, that’s enough for me to look forward to in life!

With Regards,
Adarsh Benakappa Basavaraj
‘The Coach’