Bhaiyya, it’s upsetting to hear about the violence and unrest all around,’ said Rinku. ‘I wish I could do something about it.’
‘We should join the fight against violence,’ said Rahul.
‘The idea of fighting against violence is itself violent, Rahul,’ reasoned Rakesh.
‘What are you trying to say, bhaiyya?’ asked Rinku.
‘If you want something, focus on what you want. Not on what you don’t want. When you focus on fighting against violence, where’s your focus?’
‘On fighting,’ said Rinku. ‘And violence.’
‘Right,’ said Rakesh. ‘Anything you focus on grows.’
‘So, what should we do?’ asked Rahul. ‘Just keep quiet?’
‘If you want to change the situation and not worsen it, focus on what you want. Like if you want to win or succeed, focus on winning and succeeding and not on ‘I don’t want to lose or fail’. Now tell me, what is it that you both want?’
‘We want peace,’ said Rinku. ‘Justice. Equality. Unity.’
‘Great,’ said Rakesh. ‘As opposed to fighting against violence, failing and so on. Don’t the ‘I don’t want’ phrases sound harsh compared to ‘I want’ phrases?’
‘Yes, bhaiyya,’ said Rinku.
‘Choosing what you want needs clarity,’ said Rakesh. ‘It’s hard in the beginning, but once you choose clearly, things change. For example, if you choose peace, you’ll think, talk and act peacefully. New peaceful possibilities emerge.’
‘But that’s too passive and
slow, bhaiyya,’ said Rahul. ‘Just changing our words and doing nothing else.’
‘Real and lasting change always comes from within, Rahul,’ said Rakesh. ‘It starts within you. It appears passive, but it gets you results with less effort, time and energy.’
‘What’s wrong with fighting, bhaiyya?’ asked Rahul.
‘If you can do it without fighting, why not try it?’ laughed Rakesh. ‘Remember this — act out of choice, not as a reaction. ‘I don’t want’ is a reaction and ‘I want’ is a choice. Reactions get you more of what you don’t want. Choices get you what you want. So choose well.’
‘Yes, bhaiyya,’ said Rinku. ‘Change within by focusing on what we want. And when we change, we change the world. One person at a time.’
‘Wow,’ said Rahul. ‘That’s a great start to the New Year.’
‘Let’s begin by choosing a Happy New Year!’ said Rakesh. ‘As opposed to not-wanting-an-unhappy-New-Year. And let’s focus on kadak masala chais as well!’
Pro Tip: If you want something, focus on what you want. If you focus on what you don’t want, you’ll get more of what you don’t want.
