How Pratik Sarkar breezed through Boys School and NIFT without being bullied for being gay

Obviously, there was some name calling here and there, but because he was a topper and went on to study at NIFT, he was safe. The fashion designer tells us there are safe campuses for the queer
For this 25-year-old gay fashion designer coming out of the closet was quite natural and effortless
For this 25-year-old gay fashion designer coming out of the closet was quite natural and effortless

For this 25-year-old gay fashion designer coming out of the closet was quite natural and effortless. A fish-loving Bong with a soul of a traveller who's searching for his roots, Pratik Sarkar says that pretty much sums up his life. "I was born and raised in a typical Bengali middle-class family in Kolkata. After finishing school I moved to Mumbai to study Fashion Design in National Institute of Fashion Technology. Then I lived in Bengaluru for a year and a half doing my first job. Currently, I am based in Dhaka, Bangladesh, working as a designer for a garments manufacturing company exporting garments to western countries," he adds.

No 'homo' banter in this boys school

Pratik reflects on what it was like to be different in school and college, considering the fashion industry is probably quite used to dealing with gay people, "To be honest, I never really had to come out to anyone in any way. Unlike many dramatic stories, mine was quite natural and effortless. I was an effeminate boy in school but since I was one of the toppers, I had some sense of confidence, which prevented me from getting bullied. I studied in an all-boys school, where I quite naturally had a relationship with other boys thus doing away with the stigma of being labelled as a “Homo”. It was almost normal to everyone around me that I showed my interest in guys rather than girls. Nobody behaved differently, not even my straight friends," he says and begins to narrate his story.

Being gay in style: Pratik Sarkar studied fashion designing at NIFT, Mumbai

'NIFT was cool about us being gay'

NIFT was also good for him. He adds "I have noticed a major difference between design schools and other institutions. In design schools, people are more liberal about people like us as well as other cultures. While I was working in India it was not a problem. However, in Bangladesh it is different. People have difficulty accepting us. But I have always been confident with the choices I made, so it has not been an issue to adjust."

Once he finished NIFT and started working in the fashion industry he actually grew in confidence. "I love my job. I work in a more corporate environment where the glamour is not as much as they show it on television or in movies. It’s like any other desk job but with more creative freedom. I get to travel a lot. From grassroots level to a finished product in the store, I am involved in the entire procedure and that gives me immense satisfaction."

But there's always some name-calling

But that isn't to say that he was completely shielded from the abuse that characterises being a gay person in India. "Calling me names like “aye ladies”, “chhakka” etc was there initially. It used to affect my self-confidence in the beginning. Then I had read an eye-opening article on some website which spoke about effeminacy and how society looks down on people like us. Eventually, the people who used to call me names became insignificant to me. I had a lot of help from my friends. They did not treat me specially. For them, I was just another guy."

This is why he probably did not feel out of place or different from the others around him. His orientation never bothered him. "For me, it was indifferent. I used to read about it a lot. Sometimes in magazines or newspapers, agony columns, which had numerous questions regarding sexual orientation. I was also exposed to the internet and social media, which helped me understand the perceptions people have and various other aspects," he adds.

I really want to tell any queer person, that first and foremost thing you need to start believing is that you’re not any different and like anyone else

Pratik Sarkar, Fashion Designer

Do unto them as you would do unto the straight

And that's exactly what Pratik would like to tell the people who are still finding it difficult to come out of the closet. "I really want to tell any queer person, that first and foremost thing you need to start believing is that you’re not any different and like anyone else. Please do not demean yourself. Ask yourself, do you behave differently to your straight cousin or friend because he/she is straight? Then why would anyone behave with you differently (both in a good or bad way) because of your own personal orientation? I have always believed that, if I want people not to misbehave with me for my orientation, I also need to expect no special treatment or sympathy for my orientation as well. Just be who you are, he says before concluding, "Also, always remember, treat people the way you want to be treated."

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